Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Telling the Teenagers - The End is Nigh

The Dude abides...
In an attempt to soften the blow, we treated the family to a bowling night on the town. Good times were had by all for a good three hours.  In the spirit of The Big Lebowski, I (of course) chose the screen name "The Dude".

Bumper rails in place, Team Bravo had a terrific time. Balls were lobbed into the air with giant thuds. Between the legs, two-handed granny throws were attempted with some success.  There was even two occassions (TWO!) where the bowling ball was released towards the crowd (TAKE COVER...INCOMING!!!).

But there were no injuries and I did surprisingly well in the first game.  So, feeling obligated to share, I have included a picture of my talents. Be it known, Wifey came back in game three and slaughtered me. THAT was the picture she chose to capture AND put on facebook (sigh...).

Afterwards we visited the local IHOP for a light snack, free soda refills, and some family roundtable discussion about the events that were unfolding.  I informed the girls that the only jobs that I had been offered were not local...meaning (I made sure to explain clearly) we were going to be moving soon. There was a moment of silence...

Macky calmly says: "well, it'll suck at first...but then we'll get used to it." She's our realist. Team Bravo equates the move to "we're going to live at that place that has horses?! Sweet!" Enough said there. That's four out of six  happy so far.

Sis is one unhappy camper
I look over at The Queen and she's beaming from ear to ear. She not only loves animals and WANTS to be a cowgirl, she discovered a new best friend in her same-age cousin during our Christmas trip to Oklahoma. Her only words: "When are we moving!?"

Then, slowly and with one eye squinted as if about to get clobbered, I look over at Sis. She is utterly devastated. Words weren't even needed to describe her thoughts. Best friends, potential boyfriend, everyone she has spent thousands of text messages (and that was just today) chatting with will be gone. I captured a picture of the moment, like any caring parent would do...right?

I could tell she was immediately formulating a list of everyone she could ask to move in with to stay in Arizona. Truth be told, I think she needs a new home, a new town to start over in. She had a rough time finding friends and has developed a bad habit of putting a strangle hold on anyone that befriends her. Against our advice, she rushes in to relationships with boys and within days is texting 24/7 and molding her life around them. This is only on her third "boyfriend" so far but good grief this kid is making me gray.

Under-table texting "The end is nigh"
I use the term "boyfriend" for ease of explanation but the rules in our house dictate that there will be no dating until age 16 and even then it is to be only "group dating" so that there are witnesses, for lack of a better term. Sis had no interest in boys at all until about a year ago. Now it is a constant battle. Such is the life of a father with six daughters. I'll save the "boyfriend" topic for another day. This entry is about our move to Oklahoma and my pictures of her say everything.

All in all, everyone now knows and is onboard...pending Sis. The next hurdle to tackle will be telling my mom who is my only (close) family member who lives in Arizona. I am her only child and she will NOT be happy. One battle at a time...


Next: The dates change. I find out I have one week to move.


  1. @PP Yes Sir. And I don't allow texting after 10pm (Gasp!) LoL.

  2. I suppose you rolled three strikes in the 10th frame to finish out with a 158?

  3. @DD Were you there??? LoL. But seriously. The second game, Wifey was winning until the 10th frame when I pulled a XXX on her. Third game she won and of course, that's the one she posted on her Facebook page.

  4. I have seen that same face when mine were teens. She will make a complete recovery.

  5. @Mamma Bear I think so too but she won't hear it if I say it. Everything I say equates to TOTAL ISOLATION. After she meets some new friends in a few months, she'll be fine. I'll be 20 years older but...

  6. Keep us posted. We parents are so mean. I pulled my family to Fla 6 years ago, everyone but one wanted to return home this year. When I was 11 my family was given 2 weeks notice that if my Dad wanted to keep his job we had to move, To Los Angeles. 7 years latter we moved back to MN. The girls will do just fine.


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